Way back in '01 I had been laid off from my job and to pass the time(read keep from driving my ex and kids goofy) and to be "Self Sufficient"( I had subscription to Mother Earth News) I decided to install a Vegetable Garden and since I sit on half an acre it was of epic proportions 40' x 40'(unless you have gardened before that's HUGE) I was also blessed with an abundance of manure from my 4 equines and forty odd chickens. The battle cry was do it "Old School",sooo I hand tilled the dry Las Vegas dust that passes as soil and amended the hell out of it ( I admit I cheated some and added some store bought steer manure) after this process (which took the better part of February) it was ready to plant.
I had selected two strains of corn(white and yellow, the yellow turned out to be the hardiest of the two) watermelon, cucumbers,tomatoes(vine type),red onions, scallions,sweet peas(which are not supposed to grow in the HOT sun of southern Nevada,but did) and green beans (bush type), I tended my little slice of Heaven with diligence and care using only 'organic' pest control (I.E. good bugs to kill and eat the bad bugs) weeding by hand and flooding it twice a day with good well water (I was driving several neighbors nuts with that,they were on city lines and had to pay for theirs) all my effort was paying off my 'babies" were thriving and big enough that I could let my chickens range into the garden as extra pest control and mobile tillers,then one fateful day I was called back to work,and it was good for I was on the night shift again(where I "Live and Breathe") I could still tend my garden after work...until late May/early June when the sun was coming up 2 hours before I got home(it gets brutally hot at that time in the southwest)so it was up to my Ex-wife to water and let the chickens into the garden, she did O.K. for a New York City native, she was only slightly intimidated by the Rooster, a white Leghorn (he wasn't that big as roosters go but he fit his name,"Godzilla")
The chickens were doing a great job of keeping the area bug and weed free only occasionally taking a nip out of the plants( hey its Vegas, tips are expected!) one morning after work (mid June) as was my routine I checked on the Garden and I couldn't quite place it but something was amiss, I stalked up and down the rows checking everything but didn't see what it was, however, the next morning after work it became apparent what was WRONG, my Bean Bushes were now Bean Twigs, not a leaf, not a flower nor a budding pod was left!!!! and before I could get into the house to inquire as to the reason, my Ex-Wife (moving faster than I had ever seen) came out and started explaining what had befallen my Beans,between sobs and sniffles she told me,and from her vivid description I had a vision of the chickens mounting an assault on the Bean Bushes worthy of General Sherman's march to the Sea ( I never let her tend the garden or the chickens again) and being the Mulish soul that I am I left the Bean Twigs in the ground until harvest for our Fourth of July B-B-Q, no the canned beans WERE NOT AS GOOD. and that is the story of the Great Bean Bush Massacre of '01
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